Thursday, January 29, 2009

Oh my holy hell

I told myself that I was not going to make any posts about my co-worker Amanda. I even went through my archives and deleted anything that was even remotely negative about her.

Why? Why?

Because I'm fucking stupid that's why. I was worried about hurting her feelings and I was worried that if she read some of the things I said about her that I would have trouble facing her and I would be completely embarrassed. I was being all whiny about not having the balls to say what I want to on MY blog.

Fuck that shit.

I'm about 2 seconds away from hurting her feelings and snapping her neck right after. If she isn't driving me insane with her wedding plans that I could care less about then she's being obnoxious with any one of a million clients on the phone and that is only the beginning!

She told my (our) assistant this morning that she was too defensive when she pointed out mistakes to her. I think being defensive with anything when it comes to Amanda is justified. She pointed out shit that was in my opinion totally stupid. And we all know that it's my opinion that counts. And only my opinion. I'm just saying. It's a given, but sometimes a reminder is needed.

This afternoon I was meeting with the accountant Kelly. When Kelly asked me a question Amanda answered before I could even draw in a breath to speak. Then when Kelly asked another question, she did it again. Even Kelly was annoyed. It's none of her business. Leave the accounting & bookkeeping to me sugar tits and you just keep on sniffing every one's ass.

Then she said "Oh I'm sorry, I should have let you answer. I think out loud and I should have kept my mouth shut." I ignored her. I should have responded. I'm such a pussy. I need to speak up, but my balls? They are missing. I've searched for them. I had them at one point. Brass ones. Big ones. Where did they go? I hear that they shrivel in cold water but they eventually return. I need to form a search party for them.

Missing: Kathy's Balls
Description: Big and brass
Last seen: Sometime in 2002
Reward: My undying love and devotion

What do you mean you could care less about my love and devotion? That hurts. Fucker.

Now? I want her to go the fuck away. I can't wait for the construction for our new office to be finished so she will be behind a door and out of my way and out of my business. I figure once she gets married and knocked up she'll resign and become a Stepford wife so I just have to hang in there for another year or so. Anyone know how to sabotage birth control?

I'm just saying.

Later Bitches.



Christy said...

You crack me up! I look forward to reading your blogs and Twitters because they make me smile. I wish I had the guts to write twitters as honest and harsh as yours, but sadly my entire family follows me on twitter, and therefore would be upset by the things I say about them. I should start a've inspired me. I know I probably sound like a nut, and I'm sure I am at times. But I just wanted to say thanks fir brightening my day.

Kathy said...

Thank you Christy! You brightened my day as well. You should start a blog and when you do, leave a comment so I can find you! said...


I think she should meet my co-worker "Sneezy" lol